What’s your obsession? What’s the thing you can’t live without? We’ve all got something.

It might be a pair of shoes, your fave t-shirt, a certain track you play on repeat; on the other hand it might be a coffee and a fag or perhaps something stronger… I’m about to get obsessed over M Lamar, a New York based performer and counter tenor who started out studying to become an artist. M Lamar, the twin brother of actor Laverne Cox is in London town this Thursday 6th August to do a very intimate show at VFD, formally known as Vogue Fabrics, (66 Stoke Newington Road, N16 7XB) entitled M Lamar’s Destruction, to see what it’s all about. Check in at 7:30pm.

DJ come obsessive archivist Jeffrey Hinton continues his explorations this Thursday 6th at Hoi Polloi Lates (Hoi Polloi, Ace Hotel, 100 Shoreditch High Street, E1 6QJ) with his Dreamscape series and #3-Kinky Rio. Jeffrey orchestrates film projected across the restaurant with accompanying and specific music. Starts at 10:30pm ‘til 1am. Free entry.

Gay Garage (UKGAY) could be the night you’ve been waiting for on Saturday 8th August. Is RnB, Garage the dance music you can’t get enough of? Join Mischa Mafia, Oyinboy and Jerk plus Pure Silk R’n’B with Randy and Monica downstairs from 9pm at The Glory (281 Kingsland Road, E2 8AS) for Old Skool classics, UK Garage and twerk your arse off ‘til 2am.

Up at Dalston Superstore (117 Kingsland High Street, E8 2PB) this weekend Twirl presents… Shaun J Wright on Friday 7th August. Shaun used to be in Hercules & Love Affair and now has his own record label Twirl. He’ll be joined by Hannah Holland and Josh Caffe while in the upstairs bar Jamie Bull from Homoelectric takes over duties with the Meat boys. On from 9-3am. And then SorryNotSorry Sundays VII is always the perfect way to round off the weekend at Superstore on the 9th August. Catch residents Elles, Rob-Denis, Chris Cuff & Sen pull out your fave ‘beach bae jamz’ and play a summer selection apt for a night out on the Dalston strip! 8pm-2am.

Something for midweek…Wednesday 12th August and Baby Lamé: Don’t Call It A Comeback at The Glory. Baby Lamé treads the stage to showcase her relentless, outrageous and twisted underground performance! Showtime 8.30 prompt.

And something to look forward to on Saturday 15th August. Sink The Pink: Around The World In 50 Gays! Get in early, starts at 9pm and it’s mayhem with the crème de la crème of international superstar DJs; JVP, Josh You Are and Joan Oh, plus hostess Ginger Johnson and a showcase of the most energetic dance routines and show stopping numbers from the Sink The Pink gang! #OBSESSED!

Performer, playwright, actress, chanteuse and once hailed as an ‘icon in the making’, La JohnJoseph is back with a new show, Practically Royalty, at London Wonderground. This week Jason Reid caught up with La John to find out more…

The last time we spoke was back in 2012 when you were preparing for your autobiographical show A Boy in a Dress. What fabulousness have you been up to since then? 

Yes, Boy in a Dress was quite a success. I was performing it all of 2012 and 2013  – over one hundred shows I think. Since then I had my first novel, Everything Must Go, published; I’ve played the lead in a reworking of the Duchess of Malfi, and I’ve also made a film in France and one in Germany, both of which are showing at various international festivals. Oh and Rhyannon Styles roped me into dancing onstage with the Arcade Fire at Earls Court!

You’ve been busy. And you’re still living in Berlin? 

Am I living in Berlin? I don’t know. Today, yes, but I’ll be in London for most of the fall

On an artistic and creative level, which city do you prefer? 

Well I prefer to make work in Berlin (where there is time and space) and then show it in London (where there is an infrastructure).

I guess you get the best of both worlds that way. So what’s the premise of the new show?

It’s me stepping into the shoes of a right wing socialite and basically spewing bile. It’s the darkest and simultaneously most hilarious thing I’ve ever written. The persona is that of a wealthy woman desperate for attention, probably on the verge of a psychotic breakdown.

Ahhhh and she’s Practically Royalty, hence the name. Would you consider yourself a royalist? 

Absolutely not. I’d have Jeremy Corbyn as head of state if I had my way.

YES! Totally. But don’t get me stated on all that. The show actually reflects the political and social state of the country. What do you perceive that to be?

Fucked? That’s the word that comes to mind. The show was born out of a political despair, and the urge to use humour to exorcise that angst, and hopefully through satire, flag up just what a ludicrous situation we are in.

I couldn’t agree more. Where do you sit politically? 

I’m an old Labour socialist, I think economically and in terms of social justice, that is the only pragmatic political path.

You must be very interested in the current leadership election. There seems to be a wind of change sweeping through the party.

Yes. But I want to see a united left wing movement which is inclusive and representative of women, people of colour and the LGBTI community. Isolationist politics are ruining the left.

“The show was born out of a political despair, and the urge to use humour to exorcise that angst”

I think I would be wholly unsuited to actually restructuring the country. Past notions of greatness were all so inherently racist, I don’t want to revisit that. I want to see the UK taking more responsibility for refugees, committing to a liveable wage and rent controls, and removing itself from the arms trade.

Finally, for those who have never seen you perform, how would you describe your style?

Somewhere between Hyacinth Bucket and Justin Vivian Bond, a well coiffed snarl concealing an arsenal of catastrophically offensive bon mots.

A decadent energy swept through the dimly-lit Royal Vauxhall Tavern as Miss Hope Springs took to the stage with her bespoke band on ‘tube strike Thursday’. Regardless of the fact that London’s main transport system was completely stationery, it was pleasing to see a turnout that defied this.

An audience of all ages and styles settled down for the ninety-minute musical extravaganza. A good portion of them had actually seen the show before on more than a few occasions, yet still they enthusiastically flock back time and time again, as one audience member told me: “every show is different, it’s stunning. Hope is always writing new songs”.

Before we go any further, I should firstly say that Hope writes all of the songs in her shows. Yep, all original material. Which is pretty astonishing and very rare on the cabaret scene. And you know what? Most of the numbers have a welcome familiarity to them, as though you’ve perhaps heard them before in the Hit Parade. But you haven’t. Many of the songs are written and crafted in such a clever way, so as to act as instant sing-alongs, with Hope throwing to the obedient audience from behind the piano. Stand out numbers for me included ‘The Devil Made Me Do It’,  ‘Queen of Fools’ and Let’s Run Away With the Circus’.

Daniel Lismore: “Miss Hope Springs is so good, she’s almost beyond any words I could muster. Probably the best live performer I’ve ever seen”

Hope doled out sassy one-liners, with a glint in her eye, while at the other end of the spectrum, she enveloped the whole room into anecdotal tales for ten minutes or more, culminating in a crescendo-like punchline. It’s almost as though she’s gently teasing open a bottle of champagne, but waiting, waiting, for the cork to pop. This takes great skill and artistic measure, even from the most seasoned pro. Hope has these skills in abundance.

The character of Hope has clearly been worked on at great length. At first glance, a cross between Lady Bunny and Lorna Luft, Hope doesn’t just have a sketchy background story. She has a detailed ‘This is Your Life’ style story, with attention paid to every intricacy. The man behind Hope has really invested some serious time in carving out who Hope is. As my dear old grandmother always said, ‘The devil is in the detail’.

The RVT is an almost perfect setting for Miss Hope Spring’s jazz-fuelled show, and at times you could imagine sitting in a smokey New York or LA jazz joint sipping on a bourbon. Sheer old-school elegance and class seep out of every pore of Hope, and she has that one vital ingredient that is so important to make you a successful cabaret artist: originality. There is no-one out there doing what she does or anyone that even comes close. So it’s exciting for a cabaret hag like me to witness. I’m already looking forward to the next show.

Working on the scene can prove challenging at the best of times. Guestlists to sort out. Madonna songs to remix, luxury flats to ward off. And all while you’ve got Lady Lloyd hanging off the end of the bar (or John Sizzle rolling about on top of it). But what’s it like having to deal with all that, and not being a gay man?!

Dylan Jones spoke to four of the scene’s most salient sirens on the ins and outs of negotiating one of the most ridiculous, high-octane and glittering environments on earth: the London gay scene! 

Munroe Bergdorf
DJ, hostess, model, activist and all round fierce bitch

I’ve always loved working on the gay scene…as dramatic as it can be at times. It’s a place where I feel safe, supported and encouraged to be myself. During the tough early years of my transition, I learned that although a lot of the scene didn’t understand what I was going through, there was a willingness to understand and a willingness to help.

As someone who transitioned while already working on the scene, I was hesitant and anxious about my journey to living full time as a woman being so public. I didn’t know what to expect myself, let alone how everyone else would react. Obviously not everybody fully understood; for a while I felt gossiped about and scrutinised, but then I discovered that the more vocal I was about what was going on with me, the more supported I felt.

Eventually I discovered that the scene has provided me with a platform that has allowed me to reach others who are going through similar things that I went through. Whether that be transitioning or just feeling secure with themselves and confident in their own skin. It has also allowed me to form personal and professional relationships with likeminded individuals who have helped me to see that I’m not alone in how I feel or what I experience in life.

I would actually like to take this opportunity to say thank you to everybody who came to see me at my DJ sets or contacted me on social media and took the time to ask me “how are you doing?”, “are you ok?”, “how can I help?”.  It reminded me how much I value working in this industry. It also made my transition a lot less lonely than it could have been. I hope that from seeing me being open and vocal about my own transition, those people who gossiped about me are now more likely to know how to be supportive and understanding to somebody else that could be going through the same things that I did.

Holestar
Female drag performer and DJ

Being a person with a pussy on the gay scene can be a mixed handbag. I recently won Best Drag Act at the London Cabaret Awards, something I was surprised to be shortlisted for, let alone win. While many who know and have seen my work were pleased for me, I was on the butt end of a lot of lazy misogyny. Comments like “she shouldn’t have won, she’s a woman!” and other drivel poured forth from those who should know better.

There are venues that underestimate their audiences and won’t book me because of my biological gender. Deciding the only version of a queen on the scene is a cock-in-a-frock. Thankfully I get to show off and DJ for plenty of audiences who judge me on my ability to entertain and not the contents of my pants.

As much as I lean towards women sexually (preferring to identify as queer), I socially prefer the company of men. Most of which just happen to be gay. However pulling can be tricky and I don’t go for chasers. Sex in a wig? No ta.

I’ve always been envious of the options gay men have regarding casual sex, women tending not to be so free and easy about it. When I’ve got the horn, it’d be nice to pop to a lady sauna for a fumble or female space that doesn’t involve veganism, comfortable shoes or holistic hemp basket weaving.

Being a woman on the gay scene is fabulous and many of the clichéd things that screeching fag hags love about it are true but you do need the hide of a rhino. There’s bitchery and backstabbing aplenty, but overall, it’s far more fun and accepting than any other scene I know. Long may she reign.

Princess Julia
DJ and QX Columnist 

I should set the scene to when I first started going out, because there just wasn’t as much going on as today. It was 1976. We went to punk gigs, pubs and discos. Gay discos! One thing that is rarely mentioned is that the punk scene was very gay. At the end of the 70s the New Romantic scene emerged and that was a real melting pot of people experimenting with dress but of course sexuality.

As a girl on the club scene and especially the gay club scene I felt I’d found a home. The idea of sexually segregated clubs has never appealed to me to be honest. Although I did go to the newly opened Heaven back in the day on men only nights, oh and I sometimes popped in the Coalherne and The Boltons in Earls Court which in the 70s was the epicentre of the Gay Scene.  And who knows perhaps I’ll go to the men only Brüt as an honorary member or in man drag lol! I always want to be in the most exciting places, meeting the most inventive people and listening to a diverse selection of music.

It was at The Daisy Chain at The Fridge where I was given the opportunity to DJ on a regular basis in the late 80s that I established a career traveling to clubs, DJing across the UK and beyond throughout the 90s. My favourite nights were always the gay ones of course. My fag hag legacy knows no bounds, as you can see. Where else can you go and be welcomed with open arms!?

I became a resident DJ at Kinky Gerlinky, which in the ravetastic times of the late 80s and 90s was a beacon of dressing up nights – all sexualities welcome. And that is why I pay homage to my gay disco family, a place where all are welcome. A place where in the past up to the present day there are so many creative people putting on ever-inventive nights. A place where we encourage you to be the person you really want to be.

Zoe Argiros
Bar Manager & Co-owner of The Glory

I don’t really view myself as this ‘important woman working on London’s gay scene’. Running successful bars is just my job and it’s what I’ve always wanted to do. As a child my dream was to open The Lion King Pub. It was going to have large cutouts of animals all over the walls and mobiles hanging from the ceilings. Instead I ended up with A Man To Pet dancing with snakes on the bar, Jonny Woo in a pair of Mickey Mouse gloves and John Sizzle on the floor like a turtle – so almost!

I was born in Stoke Newington and raised in Manchester so it’s probably not a surprise that I ended up working in the gay scene. My five years as manager at Dalston Superstore contained some of the most fun times of my life and it’s great to feel part of the ‘Dalston detonation’ and that whole story. The Glory is what I’ve always wanted though, to actually own my own proper pub.

People always ask me about London’s lesbian scene. I honestly don’t know much about it. I know there are very few girls nights, which are all rammed, which proves there’s a huge demand, but I think a lot of these girls go to these nights just to meet other girls, regardless of what the music or style is. At The Glory I really want to create a totally mixed Queer environment where girls don’t need to feel like it has to be a ‘girl’s night’ for them to come. Obviously we will have nights that are aimed more towards the girls, but we’ll be concentrating on making them more music orientated. We’ve got a great live set up so I’ve been getting lots of my talented female friends to do live sets and shows, that sort of thing!  So far I’ve been seeing loads of women down at the pub on a regular basis, which makes me very happy!

If there’s one thing I’ve learnt in my clubland travels, it’s that life’s too short! You just don’t know what might happen next. You’ve got to live each moment like it’s your last so on that philosophical note let’s have a look at some of the inspiring nights going on this weekend…

Last week I popped into Faggy Okay at The Glory (281 Kingsland Road, E2 8AS). It’s their weekly karaoke night hosted by Jonbenet Blonde and Ginger Johnson… go join in the fun every Thursday 8-12, hilarious!

And then down at The George & Dragon (2 Hackney Road, E2 7NS) be prepared for a weekend of musical mayhem starting off with Simba Von Reinhold and Louis Backhouse playing the tunes on Thursday 20th, The Duchess of Pork and Princess Michael of Cunt on Friday 21st and Cozette & Guy on Saturday 22nd. 8-12 midnight. Pubs are the new clubs.

If you just can’t get enough of Simba Von Reinheld check in into Lotus Eaterz III (Indolence Indolence Indolence) up at VFD (Vogue Fabrics, 66 Stoke Newington Road, N16 7XB) on Friday 21st August where he will be joined by Los Blamire, Simone Gray-Ritson (Teenage Caveman) and Liam Fawcett (City Boys Band). On til’ 3am.

They say the best things come in small packages. Queer at the Mascara Bar (72 Stamford Hill, N16 6XS) on Saturday 22nd August is the cute alternative to the more commercial nights. Paul Michael Bowden and Sam Fenn are joined by Beck Healey and Carl Farrugio from indie pop quartet Wolf Girl. 9-3am, free to get in.

The Men Who Fell To Earth return to East Bloc (217 City Road, EC1V 1JN) with The Meat Boys and Knickerbocker in tow on Saturday 22nd. An array of dance music as DJ’s go b2b for a night of your fave tunes ranging from indie, pop, rock, disco, house and everything else in between as they double up from 10.30 til’ 6am.

We’re all aboard on Sunday 23rd for the Gay Bingo Boat Party – Sea Gurls Go Wild! Yes it’s the annual outing from Jonny Woo, John Sizzle and Ma Butcher where they camp it up for a real bingo session on the River Thames leaving from Tower Millenium Pier (Lower Thames Street, EC3N 4DT) at 2:30 sharp and returning on shore at 7pm.

Looking ahead and back on land Mark Moore// S’Express presents Private Life on Saturday 29th August at The Victoria (451 Queensbridge Road E8 3AS). This month’s themed free party takes you on a journey back in time to The Roxy and Danceteria circa 1979-84 with DJ’s Mark Moore himself, Punks Jump Up, DJ Destruction and Private Life residents.

Don’t forget everyone the newly opened Bloc Bar (18 Kentish Town Road, NW1 9NX) in Camden is entertaining with an array of events. Check out Friday’s POP BOX! with superstar guest DJ’s and Sunday’s Bloc Cap Sessions from 12 midday for cabaret, shows and more!

Leaving her stateside Tupperware ladies and parties behind for the bright lights of London Town, Dixie Longate brings her Off-Broadway hit to the Royal Vauxhall Tavern this month for two exclusive shows, and the proud member of the ‘number one Tupperware seller in the world’ club was more than eager to share her top tips with Jason Reid this week…

Dixie says: “I’ve been selling Tupperware for fourteen years now. If you had told me when I got out of prison that I would be leaving my trailer each night to go out and sell plastic bowls, I would have slapped you harder than a doctor slaps a newborn baby, but as luck would have it, I ended up sticking with it and I have learned more than my fair share of valuable life lessons by selling the iconic plastic bowls. So now I’m sharing that ever so sage advice with you, my great British fans…”

Tuppeware is Versatile

While most people think of Tupperware as an essential part of any kitchen, did you know that most things can be used in the bedroom as well? Sure, the celery keeper is great to keep your greens fresh, but it also keeps some of your favourite battery operated beauties ready close at hand and fresh as a spring time daisy.

Protect your plastic

Having some people over for an impromptu party? Pull out a few of the party bowls and fill them with chips and dips and an assortment of delicious things. When they ask for leftovers to take home because you are such a naturally delightful cook, tell them to hold their hands out and plop a hearty helping right there. Don’t let anyone take your Tupperware home. It will never be seen again. And your friends aren’t really that special in the first place, now are they?

First Impressions Count

Met a new friend behind the dumpster? If he or she ends up coming to your flat unannounced because you happened to slip your business card into their pants, you don’t want to be shocked or embarrassed when they open your fridge staring at spoiled food. Tupperware makes sure that your embarrassment stays out of the kitchen and ends up in the bedroom where it belongs.

Drive Responsibly

What makes every spin around a roundabout more fun when you are driving? Booze, that’s what. Now you will never be in a pickle again when you keep the Tupperware wine bottle opener in your glove box. Who needs gloves when uncorking a bottle of fine French wine at a red light will keep you warm enough?

Save Water and Your Pennies

Your Tupperware washes up quickly and easily just by throwing it in the dishwasher or if you aren’t all that well off and you’re living in the basement of an old librarian’s house or haven’t saved up enough money to move out of your folk’s house, and a dishwasher seems like a pie-in-the-sky luxury item, then just bring it into the shower with you in the morning and kill two birds with one stone.

And Finally… 

I know you hate your in-laws. Especially when they incessantly talk about your sister’s new baby and wonder why you aren’t married and shooting out little ones like a tennis ball serving machine. Just take the chloroform from the bedside table and give it to the baby to play with. Kids are naturally curious and that nap will last a good long time. That doesn’t have anything to do with Tupperware, but it’s just a good, sound piece of advice.

• You can catch Dixie Longate’s Tupperware Extravaganza at the RVT on the Wednesday 26th.

Critically acclaimed frockumentary Dressed As A Girl was the talk of the queer cinema scene when it premiered at The British Film Institute in March. Now it’s part of POUT, an LGBT film festival showcasing the best contemporary movies. 

We caught up with Dressed As A Girl’s pontificating, prancing protagonist Jonny Woo to get a bit of a background on the film and how it’s been received.

Hey Jonny, tell us a bit about Dressed as a Girl for those who don’t know about it.

The film as a whole looks at six people who are on the gay scene in London and who are part of a scene, which in this case is the East London drag scene. And it looks at our lives, it looks at the trials we encounter and the way we overcome them. One of the things that Colin [Rothbart, director] chose to focus on at the beginning is how the excesses of partying led to my hospitalisation. My story starts there. It kicks off with that but that’s not the thrust of the film in any way.

Each of the characters are dealing with their own demons and experiencing their own triumphs. It’s filmed over six years and it celebrates the scene without unnecessarily saying it’s greater than it actually is. It watches it and documents it in a higher, objective way.

How did you come to be involved in the film?

Because Colin the director and Holestar who’s in it had an idea of documenting the scene. It was going to be just about Glastonbury. I’m part of the gay tent [NYC Downlow] that goes to Glastonbury, I’m one of the people who started it all up, and so I agreed to be in it. They wanted people to be in it and I agreed to take part. We didn’t have any idea which way the film was going to go. It just got longer and longer and ended up being a film that documented our lives.

It’s difficult to follow people around. When people are getting on with their lives it’s not necessarily that convenient for them to be documented continuously. All the cast have their various lives so it wasn’t really possible to do a six month look at the scene.

Can you see a transformation in yourself over the last six years?

I can see a transformation in myself and I can see a transformation from the final interview I gave. In my final interview I’m giving, it’s about stopping drinking and I’ve got a kind of earnest attitude towards it. I’m a lot more relaxed about it now and there are snippets of interviews I gave I can really see the changes, physically and more to my attitude, my handle on things. You grow up in six years and I changed a lot in the past year. The characters changed physically and they also changed their attitude to their lives, not just in the drag scene, which is continuous. We fall in and out of love with it.

What’s the response been like so far?

People generally respond to it very well. Obviously people who are more familiar with the scene and familiar with the characters really respond to it because it’s nice to see something they’re familiar with being documented. I think it’s a really interesting, honest, unpretentious documentary that doesn’t try to be too clever.

What do you think the viewers will take away from it?

I think people come away feeling very lifted, and feeling that there’s a community, and that all this stuff about the scene is dying isn’t necessarily true. The London scene is thriving and vibrant and very strong. It’s about the people in it. If you want to truly see the gay community, watch this film.

• DRESSED AS A GIRL is screening at Picturehouse Central on 6th September, with a live cabaret performance and Q&A afterwards.

Dylan Jones reports on the wedding of century

When asked what they’re doing at the weekend, most people respond with “Oh, my mate’s having a barbecue then we’re gonna go out for some drinks.” Or maybe “Oh, I’m cat-sitting my friend’s Siamese, she’s called Helen Keller” or maybe even “oh, I’m reviewing XXL for QX Magazine.”
But you do NOT expect them to say “Well, the guy who owns Sweatbox Sauna and his artist fiancé are having a post-heteronormative, avant-garde wedding celebration at an underground venue in London Fields, with conceptual semen art and waiters in jockstraps. So yeah, I’m going to that.” 

It was the extravagant, unapologetically insane, totally, wonderfully inappropriate wedding of Mark Ford and Jason Woodson (now Jason Ford), whose arrival on the back of a white horse in a shower of feathers, glitter, and muscular men, set the tone for the evening. It was like a Lady Gaga music video crossed with some sort of dystopic porn film, and it was EXACTLY the sort of ridiculousness we go in for. Being so pretentious that you’re unpretentious is the pinnacle of cool these days. For all the fluff and foof and debauchery, there was a twinkle in the eyes and tongues firmly in cheeks of the beaming couple.

The theme was to go against social norms, a rebellion against everything the traditional wedding represents. Guests were greeted by a hilariously extravagant entrance leading into East London haunt The Laundry’s underground performance space. An arc of rainbow balloons over a huge pink carpet, flanked by a host of photographers, not to mention security staff that looked like they’d fallen out of a Treasure Island Media DVD box set.

Artworks, posters and quotes plastered the concrete walls from pictures of the happily grinning couple to posters that said things like “Love is buying your crystal from John Lewis instead of Vauxhall.”

Inside, performer and political purveyor of filth David Hoyle was perched demurely on a bar stool, champagne flute in one hand, cigarette holder in the other. I said hi, and told him I was there for QX Magazine. “Ah yes,” he said distantly, taking a sip of champagne “QX…the people’s publication.” What an accolade!

Speaking of champagne, I just need to take a moment to emphasise the unrivalled, audacious amazingness of the free bar. It was the best free bar I’ve ever been to in my life. And that’s coming from someone who’s basically got a degree (BA Hons) in free bars. They had aforementioned lovely champers. They had a seemingly infinite supply of Absolut vodka. They had wine. Both red and white. And it was GOOD wine. Free bar wine almost always has a distinct bouquet of vinegar, but this, as my Northern friend Jake said, went down a RIGHT treat. We asked for a glass and had a bottle thrust at us.

We’d just perched ourselves next to David Hoyle when event organiser Cal Strode swept up to us with a clipboard and an earpiece, looking EXACTLY how a wedding organiser might look in a romcom starring Jennifer Lopez, e.g. amazing.

“Come on, I want to take you to see the cum sheet,” he said, pushing long Jared Leto-esque hair out of his eyes. We thought it best just not to ask and go with it. He led us into a small concrete room, in which was suspended a bed sheet with hundreds of ejaculations on it. A criss-crossing, crusty pattern of white splooges, representing On the other side was printed a collage of Grindr messages from the ejaculatees (ejaculatees? Maybe ejaculators). It was either completely vulgar or complete genius. Perhaps vulgar genius! You never know with art do you.

After the cum-splattered bed sheet, it was time for the amuse-bouche (WHAT A SENTENCE!). It was scallops which were lovely and buttery. There was an initial moment of awkwardness as we didn’t have a table to sit at. Luckily I’d wasted no time in befriending the beautiful in-house pole dancer, Nico. As soon as he saw we didn’t have a table, he offered to find us one. And he did, literally. He found one, carried it over to us, plonked it down at the bar, flicked a table cloth across it and threw down some cutlery with a flourish. “There you go!”

The food was, of course, served by muscular waiters in sparkly red pants, called things like Javier and Brent. Serenading us through the main course was

Dusty Limits, who was a bit like a more engaging, SLIGHTLY older version of Taylor Swift. Whacking away at the piano and belting through salacious country numbers like her life depended on it! Lovely. There was also a play about Sweatbox, enacted by two men who spent their entire time on stage in the crab position, scuttling back and forth and talking about shit. It sounds absolutely horrible, but it wasn’t, it was amazing. You had to be there really.

After the food had been polished off and speeches by various adoring friends and family members were made, it was time for the real party as music blared and everything descended into entirely appropriate debauchery.

The vibe for the whole evening was perfection. Beautifully laid out traditional white wedding banquet tables scattered around a shadily lit underground bar in East London. Genuinely beautiful romantic photography paired with insane homoerotic art. Cumerbunds and cum-splattered bed sheets. Anal and Absolut. Grindr and grenadine. It was a flawless and defiant statement on life as a gay man in twenty-first century London. The sleaze, the glamour, the insanity, the danger, the expense, the unrivalled, unequivocal FUN of it all.

Or maybe it wasn’t. Maybe I’m just reading too much into it. Maybe gorgeous Mark and Jason just thought “fuck it. We want a bed sheet that loads of people have cum on, and we want to ride in on a big white horse, and we want champagne, and we want scallops, and we want hot waiters in jock straps. Why? Because we CAN goddamit!” And in a way that would make it all the more meaningful, and all the more amazing. CONGRATULATIONS BOYS.

[Show as slideshow]

Photos: Stuart Howart

This bank holiday weekend, super-clubbing geniuses Orange Nation are taking over the iconic Café de Paris in a glittering glissade of glow sticks, glamour and gays, with one of the biggest bank holiday bashes of the year. 

We grabbed DJs Fat Tony and Miswhite between jumping in and out of Ubers with their decks, to discuss what vibes they’re expecting for the night, what’s behind the sparklingly extravagant concept and, most importantly, whether they like their orange juice with bits or no bits (ORANGE juice! See what we did there?)

Hey Guys! So what IS House of Orange? What are the vibez?

Fat Tony: House of Orange is an amazing party at Cafe de Paris that will bring back, all the vibes and amazingness of Sundays past. Its the first of many more parties to come. It will be vogue-tastic, dancing, prancing and showing off!

Miswhite: It’s somewhere everyone is welcome to come and express themselves through music, fashion, beauty, art and of course dance – in all its forms.

What do you think you’ll both be doing by 2am?

Fat Tony: I will be DJing at 2am, Miswhite will be on the dance floor shaking by 2am!
Miswhite: Throwing shapes, vogueing, getting my groove in general on and representing the House Of Diore with great fierceness!

What kind of thing do you think people should wear?

Fat Tony: It’s a Sunday night out in a new venue. So smart, glamorous, exciting. Or just come as you are! Or as your alter ego.

Miswhite: Something bold and daring – don’t be afraid to go all out… but DON’T wear polyester….or God help you.

Now we’re going to ask you some Orange-related questions…

Orange Juice or Terry’s Chocolate Orange?

Fat Tony: Terry’s Chocolate Orange
Miswhite: Chocolate…. ALWAYS chocolate!

Concentrate or not from concentrate?

Fat Tony: Never from concentrate, always fresh!

Miswhite: Not from concentrate – I am definitely not known for my concentration

Bits or smooth?

Fat Tony: Life would be so boring without the juicy bits!
Miswhite: Bits of course – bringing that juice all the bitty realness.

Hot ginger or hot blonde?

Fat Tony: Hot blonde, I have one already!
Miswhite: Without a doubt hot ginger – what lady doesn’t love a rare exotic gem?

What can we all expect to take away from House of Orange?

Fat Tony: A feeling, a memory and a lesson well learnt…or Miswhite, keep her!

Miswhite: You will take away very special memories of the night and your life will be changed!

• Café de Paris, 3 Coventry Street, W1D 6BL. 8pm – 3am. £12 concession, £15 OTD. 

I love it when there’s a takeover, and look who’s in town this week; none other than Scissor Sister herself Ana Matronic, who’s having a Robot Takeover at The Glory (281 Kingsland Road, E2 8AS) on Friday 28th.

She’s got a book coming out called Robot Takeover (Octopus publishing). Hosted by the wondrous Bishi, Miss Matronic will be presenting a live gadgetry game show at 8pm, wired together with Jonny Woo and Lazy Susan at the controls. The evening continues with a suitably selected electronic DJ set from Jacqui Potato and myself!

Oh those crazies up at VFD (66 Stoke Newington Road, N16 7XB) have got a fun-packed weekend planned. Start it off with Soaking Wet and a major drench sesh on Friday 28th from Alex Padfield, eith music from Cruise Control, Francis Drayson, Vincent De Tallyrand-Perigod and Alex herself. There’s a photo exhibition too and it’s on til’ 3am.

Oh yeah, it’s bank holiday weekend…meanwhile we’re still talking about Friday 28th August. Squeeze yourselves into Inferno at Dalston Superstore (117 Kingsland High Street, E8 2PB) and join Lewis G. Burton and Sebastian Bartz for everything; music, DJ’s and performance, 9 til’ the end!

Presented by Bear Your Soul, The Hackney Attic (270 Mare Street, E8 1HE) is the home of Soul Attic. On Saturday 29th groove on down for a session with Fred Mann from 8pm til’ 1am. Playing only vinyl, it’s a unique experience.

Saving yourself for Sunday 30th? Here we go then with a few highlights including Best Little Barn Dance 2: Bank Holiday Ho Down! at The Glory with Jonbenet Blonde and Ginger Johnson skipping around haystacks to the music of DJ Hay Balen. Starts at 2pm til’ 11pm!

It’s the East Bloc Bank Holiday Sunday Terrace Party at The Magic Roundabout (Old Street Roundabout, EC1Y 1BE) on Sunday 30th, starting at 3pm. DJ’s Jeffrey Hinton, Neil Prince, Ursula Snakes, Johnny Kalifornia plus more including myself! You have to go to this place; it’s on top of Old Street Roundabout!

And for something a bit different I’ll be DJing with Tasty Tim up at Orange: Deep In Vogue at Cafe De Paris (3 Coventry Street, W1D 6BL) on Sunday 30th in The Boudoir!

Meanwhile Debbie Does Dalston up at Dalston Superstore on Sunday 30th… residents Sina Sparrow and Bitchcakes are joined by guest DJ’s Whitney Weiss, Neil Prince, and Elles McFierce’em.

§10.9 Summer Rave with San Francisco’s Honey Soundsystem, Dan Beaumont and Charlie Porter DJing, is also back with an all-night session planned up at Bloc (Unit 3, Autumn Yard, Autumn Street, E3 2TT) 11-6am. Happy days!

Round off your weekend with a special treat… Jacqui Potato Does The White Cubicle toilet gallery at the The George & Dragon (2 Hackney Road, E2 7NS)! Yep, tucked away in the furthest reaches, the infamous toilet gallery has a cult following and so has Jacqui. 8-12 on Monday 1st September!

Honey Soundsystem is a renowned quartet of homosexual party-starters from San Francisco. All four members of the collective are in London to play Sunday’s Chapter 10 summer Rave as part of a European tour that sees them ending up at Berghain /Panorama Bar.

So, introductions please… 

So we have Robert Yang who we affectionately refer to as Robot or Robot Hustle, who is now more widely know as Bezier. There’s Josh Cheon & Jason Kendig, the two bearded members of the family. And then there’s the blonde ambition herself, Jackie House or Jacob Sperber depending on whose parents you’re asking.

How did Honey Soundsystem come about? 

Just a bunch of gals who obsess over music. And men. And music.
And men.

What makes San Francisco a unique place to dance? 

As much as the culture seems to be shifting in San Francisco, there are still plenty of freaks who love to let their flag fly high!

What are your top three Honey anthems? 

Currently we’re lucky enough to have some of our own productions holding that top spot. “Mina” by Bezier, “Stydive” by Jackie House and another fave getting plenty of rotations at recent gigs is “U Won’t C Me” by our good buddy Mystic Bill.

Who is your ultimate fantasy guest? 

We’re about to make one of those fantasies a reality when we host DJ Harvey at the end of September!

What can we expect on Sunday? 

Nothing but bumpers and pumpers. A proper session if you will. Sweaty vibes and sexy friends.

What do you love about London’s gay nightlife? 

The boys and gals aren’t afraid to lose their inhibitions!

• Honey Soundsystem are playing at the Chapter 10 Summer Rave on Sunday 31st at Bloc (Unit 3, Autumn Yard, E3 2TT) 11pm-6am. Tickets £9.

I first met Asifa Lahore during Drag Idol 2012, in 79CXR of all places. I was on the judging panel and she was an eager new act on the scene.

During the competition she grew into her character and gained great confidence, which was rewarded with a third place overall in the grand final, despite dividing opinions between judges throughout.

Since then, Asifa has worked tirelessly at some of the country’s biggest gaysian nights, and more recently has become an active and very public voice for the LGBT Muslim community. Gaysian nights may well be something that’s new to you, but they’ve been going for many years. One of the first clubs I regularly minced along to when I landed in London as a fresh-faced chicken was Club Kali, along with my then boyfriend who was Muslim. To this day it remains of the friendliest club nights I’ve ever been to (and still going strong). However, the (very gay) Muslim boyfriend was sent to Pakistan, is now married to a woman, and has three children. This is the crux of what Asifa is campaigning against: the enforced choice of religion and culture, over personal happiness and being true to oneself. Asifa is living proof that you can have the best of both worlds.

Muslim Drag Queens was billed as ‘a rare insight into a clandestine community’ and the publicity prior to broadcast was unprecedented in the drag world. Focusing on three young gay Muslims, with Asifa being the focal point, the documentary began with a look behind the scenes of her everyday life, as the UK’s first out and proud Muslim drag queen.

The death threats, the risqué performances, the tutoring, and the activism were all on display, dealt with sensitively, accompanied by exquisite narration from Sir Ian McKellen and many inspiring lines from Asifa. ‘I’m saying fuck you to all those who send death threats, and I’m gonna look fabulous while doing it.”

We were also introduced to Ibrahim, an excitable novice performer from Mauritius who had just come out to his conservative and devoutly religious family. What a joy he was to watch! Full of wonder and glee in every scene, his debut drag performance as Sofia Less (AMAZING name) had this old cabaret hag misty eyed.

Our third queen, Zareena Khan, is the one I imagine divided opinions the most. A self-identifying drag queen, Zareena dresses as a female and dates Muslim men, many of whom are married. ‘I do drag to satisfy myself, to be more liked and to gain more friends. Once you start becoming feminine, people notice you’, she says.

Zareena’s story is a whole different article (and show) of it’s own, and whilst I enjoyed watching her, I believe the makers of the documentary had a responsibility to ensure the lines were not blurred between drag, transvestitism and sex, mainly because the general tweeting public are stupid enough as it is.

Asifa’s stoic resilience throughout is awe-inspiring. She is one of life’s doers. Standing up to your community when they won’t accept you takes balls of steel, especially when some sectors of that community are notoriously anti-gay. And marrying that self-love with a continued loyalty to the faith and culture that is so important to you shows a deep strength of character. One thing I’d like to have seen more of is Asifa’s relationship with her family, however the final scene with her mother left me a blubbering wreck.

Muslim Drag Queens is groundbreaking in the context of increasing visibility and creating a public dialogue around a section of our community that has been hidden away for too long, and the bravery displayed by all those who took part should be applauded. As Asifa said: ‘This is the start of something brand new’.

• Muslim Drag Queens aired on C4 on 24th August 2015, it is currently available to watch on 4OD.

BRÜT barges back into the city of London this Bank Holiday, bringing you a feast of bears, blokes and hunks. Behind the decks this time round will be delicious Antipodean delight Dan Slater. Rob Devlin caught up with him on his world tour, somewhere between Turkey and Malta, for a chat about what to expect when he hits the Steel Yard this weekend.

Hey Dan, how’s the tour going?
The tour has been fantastic! I started in Brazil just over a month ago and I just arrived in Istanbul this morning. Everywhere has been amazing.
Where have you been?
In the last month I’ve played in Sao Paolo, Nice, Munich and Dusseldorf, before hitting Barcelona for Circuit. Then I headed to Rome to board the Atlantis Mediterranean Cruise to DJ there for ten days. I stopped off at Mykonos and spun at the opening XLSIOR party before finishing the cruise in Turkey. I’m in London this weekend, before heading to San Diego and San Francisco for gigs, before winging back to Sydney.
What are you most looking forward to about your London trip?
Apart from the shopping and some culture, I’m really looking forward to partying with the locals again – Londoners sure know how to party.
You’ll be the first Aussie behind the decks – what can the BRÜTs expect from your set?
I’m tailoring my set especially for BRÜT and really look forward to playing on the tech-ier side of house – I don’t often get the chance to spin to crowds as open as London – Ive heard great things about the night, so I cant wait to experience and spin to the BRÜTs.
How’s life in Sydney?
Life in Sydney is great but the clubs are currently suffering from  stupid nanny state stupid laws. But if you like great weather, beaches and amazing food it helps make up for the restricted nightlife.
Are the bears big down under?
There is a healthy bear scene in Sydney and Melbourne – and they hold some pretty major parties.
What have you got planned for the rest of the year?
After I return to Sydney, I’m going to take a travel breather and base myself in Australia for the summer to get back into the studio. I have some productions I’ve been working on and I need stay put  or a little to finish them. Early next year, I’m back stateside and booked for some major parties so it will be great to spend the some time in the Aussie summer.
Thanks for stopping by!
Cheers – hope to see you on the dancefloor!

• Catch Dan Slater on Sunday 30th August at BRÜT (The Steel Yard, 13 – 16 Allhallows Lane, EC4R 3UL) 10pm-6am. Tickets £15.

Mike Pony, of cult queer night Horseplay, gives us a guided tour round his home of Bristol, from where to find the hot bearded boys, where the mixed nights to dance with all your pals happen, and why the city has a lot more to offer than mainstream provincial gay nights…

With so many friends, ex-lovers and former flings ditching the capital for sunnier climes or moving home to take advantage of the relatively cheaper rent in the rest UK, it can feel like there’s been a bit of a London exodus. But in reality it just means new friends to make, and more importantly new places to go stay when you need a break from the rat race. With this in mind, we at QX are taking a look at the LGBT scenes in cities both here and abroad and speaking to the promoters, DJs and venue-owners in the know about the secret delights their scene has to offer.

Aspects of Bristol’s LGBT scene have come under fire recently with a controversial op-ed in Pink News from the owner of gay nightlife brand OMG. Why is this not a true representation of the scene?

For me streaming a playlist in a club instead of employing DJs is the antithesis of what clubs are about. A good DJ knows exactly when to drop the right beat to keep the dancefloor moving; it’s a shared live experience. I’m not interested in being sold a regulated, homogenised night out, I want to be surprised and taken on a journey. Luckily Bristol promoters are pumping out amazing underground parties like no other city right now. We don’t have to suffer capitalist chain clubs.

Horseplay is known for both hot bearded boys as well as your grand concepts and immersive on-site performance art happening alongside the music. What made you veer slightly to the left of the traditional gay clubbing experience?

When we started we attracted lots of hot beardy men, but we are a much more diverse night now with more women coming along. My background is in live art and immersive theatre, so it’s been fun to experiment with that in our parties. We’ve had nights where our punters have been fed pavlova by drag-ballerinas or had their genitals immortalised by an illustrator and displayed on the walls of the club. We don’t always do immersive art stuff, sometimes we just go for an all out rave in a weird place like an old coroners courts or underground police cells. We like to mix it up.

We’re packing our bags and coming for an extended visit. What other nights should we be making a beeline for and why?

Dirtytalk – Sleazy underground house and a proper crate-digging attitude to tunes. Always in surprising venues with amazing DJ bookings.
Don’t Tell Your Mother – Laid back indie disco/LGBT social. It’s good for hanging out and chatting to your mates. Their monthly night is like the gay bar we want to socialise in all year round.
Eat Sleep Drag Repeat – New drag night at The Queenshilling. The Shilling is upping its game and trying out new things; they recently hosted Amour Ami, a techno party run by some hot up-and-coming promoters. One to watch.

What if we just want a quiet cider in a gay bar? In local vernacular “where’s that to?” and “cider I up!”

We could check out The Phoenix where they host Don’t Tell Your Mother. It’s a gay owned bar run by two great guys which has a lovely garden. The food is delicious.

What’s the best piece of advice you would give to a budding baby homo about to explore the delights of the South West scene?

Dig deeper. Under the surface there is lot going on. Don’t accept the ordinary, Bristol is extraordinary.

There seems to be a fair few LGBT-friendly parties happening, bringing over big guests like DJ Sprinkles and Boris. Why do you think these inclusive mixed nights work well in Bristol?

I think mixed nights with no agenda are probably the future of gay clubbing. We don’t usually use gay venues for Horseplay because there aren’t any venues that suit our sleazy, strobey vibe. We just want a dark basement somewhere, a dash of smoke and strobe and a massive sound-system. Attitudes to sexuality have changed and LGBT friendly parties are as much a safe space as gay bars used to be, so we go where the good beats are.

Be honest, where are the Grindr hot-spots in the city? Asking for a friend…

The scruffy, hot dirty boys hang out in Stokes Croft and Easton.

Sum up for our dear readers please, why you love your fair city?

It’s an easy, laid back and leftfield city full of sexy people just doing their thing. I don’t feel the pressure here that I felt when I lived in London. Rents are reasonable, parties are good, eating out is affordable and Bristol has its own way of doing things. It’s the city looks at stuff and says “How would BRISTOL do that?” It’s an awesome place to live.

It’s not often I find myself with nothing to do… there always seems to be something; I’m sure you’re the same. I can find the most entertainment from the simplest and often mundane of things. 

Alas and woe, news of the forthcoming closure of beloved pub The George & Dragon (2 Hackney Road, E8 7NS) broke a couple of weeks ago and we’re all getting our heads around it. Start off the weekend on Thursday 3rd at Alternative Nation Vol 5 where The Greek Ambassador Panos Zerdevas (Sugarlow Boys) invites special guests to DJ with him, this month it’s his bezzie Glyn Parry.

Scottee is back on Friday 4th September with a special edition of Fraff at The Glory (281 Kingsland, E2 8AS). Show time 7:30. Be prepared for a different spin on spoken word with resident Jack Rooke, special guests and a round of applause for the “best shittiest poem!”

Up at Dalston Superstore (117 Kingsland High Street, E8 2PB) on Friday 4th #Pleased celebrate their 1st Birthday with a party hosted by our fave pig-nosed drag star Ma Butcher. Resident DJ’s Jon ‘Pleased’ Wimmin & Paul Woods with special guest Hi Fi Sean are in the basement club whilst upstairs those UN-Lucky Bitches play all the hits in the bar. On ‘til 3am loves.

If you ever catch yourself saying there’s nowhere late to go on a Saturday night then get down to Savage Disco at the Metropolis Strip Club (235 Cambridge Heath Road E2). They turn it out every week with a night like no other from 11pm until 5am. Superstar DJ’s include Jonjo Jury, Luke Howard and Joshua James. See you on the dance floor then, I’m due a visit!

Things to look forward to in September… A screening of cult film Dressed As A Girl at The Hackney Picturehouse (270 Mare Street, E8 1HE) on Friday 11th September with an afterparty from 8:30 at The Hackney Attic where Jonny Woo will be doing a turn and I’ll be DJing.

Next up an exhibition from young artist Jenkin van Zyl at The Mill Co. Project, Maureen Lipman Building (43 De Beauvoir Crescent, N1 5SG) on Thursday 17th September, 6pm until 11pm. Jenkin’s work is truly astounding, a multimedia experience of film and installation. I suggest you experience Jenkin van Zyl first hand!

Has social media changed the way we club? Dear reader, I suspect many of you may not remember the distant past, when news of club nights spread via word of mouth and the trusty ‘real life’ flyer. Nowadays it’s the trusty notification button that I couldn’t live without! 

We start our weekend at Thrush – in times of TERROR on Friday 11th September where The Yeast London Cabaret collective, spearheaded by Oozing Gloop, are hosting a ‘freakshow exhibiting highlights of the local lowlife’ at The Glory (281 Kingsland Road, E2 8AS) from 8pm until 10pm. The night doesn’t end there, carry on at Freaky Fridays until 2am with the ‘semi-legendary’ Mattmachine Dance Party, music from NYC’s West Village stars Cameron Mitchell (Hedwig and the Angry Inch), Paul Dawson (Shortbus) and The Men Who Fell To Earth gang, namely Tony Fletcher.

Over at the Royal Vauxhall Tavern (372 Kennington Lane, SE11 5HY) it’s the Meat Eighteen Launch Party on Friday 11th, 10pm ‘til 4am. Guest DJ the one and only John Sizzle playing with the Meat Boys residents plus special treat Lotus Disco from Saigon flying in to celebrate a night to remember!

Debbie: Back To School is on September 12th at the Resistance Gallery (265 Poyser Street, E2 9RF). They don’t really want to go back to school, so instead they’re having their monthly party with Sina Sparrow, Bitchcakes and guest DJ Jane Dinmore playing the best of everything girl-fronted, plus a star turn performance from Rudi Douglas.

Over at Bloc Bar (18 Kentish Town Road, N1 9NX) in Camden the weekend looks decidedly jolly! Regular nights Friday’s Pop Box! Saturday’s I Take Requests and Sundays ‘Bloc Cap’ Sessions all with special DJ guests and exciting drag performance!

Okay, get ready for something special. Jonny Woo and Band: TRANSFORMER, back from a sellout run at Edinburgh Fringe, are coming to the Soho Theatre (21 Dean Street, W1D 3NE) from Tuesday 15th September to Saturday 19th. This is Jonny Woo’s theatrical rock ‘n’ roll homage to Lou Reed’s seminal album Transformer with special guests including the gorgeous Miss Cairo as Candy Darling, Fi McClusky belting out additional vocals and Jonny channeling Lou Reed himself. Show time 9:45pm.

Returning for what’s set to be the most memorable Drag Roast to date, QX and the Royal Vauxhall Tavern have once again teamed up to bring you a night guaranteed to top them all. This time round, Brighton’s Maisie Trollette aka David Raven – drag artiste, actor and singer of more than fifty years – will be roasted by his friends (Jimmy Trollette, Dave Lynn and Miss Jason). The roasters will be serving up the most salacious stories and suitably acidic anecdotes – totally no holds barred, too. This is a one-off event, never to be repeated, with all proceeds going directly to the Terrence Higgins Trust. Jason Reid was mincing about in Brighton this week and spoke to Maisie ahead of the roast… 

It’s lovely to speak to you again, David. Are you looking forward to getting roasted? 

Well the last time it happened I was on this cannibal island and they’d put me on a spit that turned round and round. They eventually let me go though because I kept pinching the sausages, you see…

What are you expecting?

Darling I have no idea what to expect, but I love new shows and ideas. I know they’re going to be delving into the past and talking about things I’ve probably forgotten.

So you know the premise, right? Basically the roasters will take turns ‘taking the piss’, and then you get to do the same to them afterwards…

Oh I can’t take the piss, it’s not in my nature! I mean, with those three there’ll be so much scope anyway, dear.

This is your first Drag Roast in London. Did you get to choose your own roasters? 

No, but I was sent a list of suggestions. Some I looked at and thought, ‘who are they?!’ But Jimmy, Dave and Jason will have plenty to say, that’s for sure.

Do you have a special relationship with all of them? 

They are my life. Jimmy and I were the first live act on the scene after winning a talent contest over forty years ago – we hit it off straight away. The same with Dave and Jason, the connection was instant. A good friendship is one that is filled with years of laughter. Just as ours have been.

Of course there’ll be music from the four of you too, any ideas yet what you’ll be performing. Go on, tease us.

Are you sure I’m allowed to say?

Oh go on, I won’t tell. 

Well Jimmy and I will probably be singing the very first song we performed together (I was always the ‘straight’ man), called ‘When I Take My Sugar to Tea’ [David sings]. It’s a good old 1920/30’s song dear.

Let’s talk a bit about the RVT, what are your greatest memories of performing there over the years?

I’ve been lucky enough to work with so many great artists there, from Kathy Kirby to Diana Dors. It’s just special. Always has been and always will be.

What made it so special back when you were a young performer? 

It was the only gay entertainment venue, darling, and all the boys and the theatre luvvies would flock there, making it THE place to be. I mean I could name drop like mad, when I think back to people like Freddie Mercury and Andy Bell being in there on Sundays, and in those days the pubs would shut in the afternoon, too.

You have decades of performing experience under your wig and you’re the UK’s longest performing drag artiste, so in your opinion what makes for a good drag artiste? 

The audience is boss, and your main aim should be to make them happy. If you enjoy what you do then so will they. Always remember you’re an artist, too, a professional, and conduct yourself as such. If you can do that, you’ll have the time of your life in this great world we call drag.

It’s been an absolute pleasure talking to you as always David. Bring on the Drag Roast now…

And you my darling, I can’t wait. It’s going to be a very special night.

• Thursday 17 September, doors 7pm, show 8:30pm, £10 in advance, £12 on the door.

Royal Vauxhall Tavern, 372 Kennington Lane, SE11 5HY

www.vauxhalltavern.com/events/event/drag-roast-with-maisie-trollette

ROASTER: Jimmy Trollette

When did I first meet David? Before God was born, that’s when! Yes, a long time ago indeed. I remember where it was though, very clearly; The Castle pub in Battersea, everyone would flock there on a Saturday night. I used to sit in the corner on my own by the piano, and one week David invited me over to join him and his friends. That’s how our friendship started. The landlady of The Castle then asked us to perform in drag. And that’s when The Trollette’s were born. My first impressions of him? He instantly came across as so friendly and warm – a joy to be around. Forty years on, we still remain dear friends, even though we don’t see each other as much now. It’s a very special bond that we have.

ROASTER: Dave Lynn

As a young performer in the 80’s I was in awe of Maisie and The Trollette’s, they were the cabaret sensation of that era and their live musical performances mixed with sharp comedy was so refreshing. I first met Maisie at The Union Tavern in Camberwell, way back when. I recall how he radiated friendliness to anyone he met and was always supportive of new acts (including me). He has a cheeky side too, almost like a naughty schoolboy, which resonates to this day. Throughout his career, which started circa 1880’s, David has never shied away from any challenge, which was doubly hard in the days before gas and electricity. But seriously, if it wasn’t for Maisie Trollette, I’m not sure I’d be who I am today.

ROASTER: Miss Jason

The Oriental in Hove (Maisie’s guesthouse at the time) was where we first met. The year was 1998, and I was a much bigger girl back then. MUCH bigger! I remember she took one look at me and said jokingly, “don’t fall off that stool, dear, because the Richter scale can’t take it.” After the ice had been broken she held out her hand for me to kiss and asked where I was from, I replied, ‘Portsmouth!’ She counted her rings to check I hadn’t stolen any, and we then became friends for life. I was a regular visitor to Maisie’s guesthouse. She was Brighton’s answer to Sybil Fawlty.

HOST: La Voix

The first time I saw Maisie perform was in 2006, long before La Voix was created. All I remember is howling with laughter at the filthy jokes – even more so when she got the punchline wrong and said “well I fucked that one up dears!”

It was at Maisie’s birthday show in 2012 when I first worked with her. After straining to read my name from the poster advert, she announced me onto the stage: “Please welcome a dear friend of mine… LA VOID.” Maisie also has an amazing skill of undercutting you when you least expect it. Upon Arriving at Miss Jason’s fashion show in Brighton last year, dressed in a new outfit and gorgeous hat, my hair freshly styled, feeling totally fabulous as you can imagine, Maisie clocked my old shoes and said “I love those shoes, they go with everything you own don’t they!”

I’m so honoured to be hosting Maisie’s Drag Roast. A night never to be repeated, and guaranteed to make RuPaul’s Drag Race look like a amateur trial of cabaret.

Club behemoth XXL celebrates its 15th birthday this weekend, so scene editor James Egan had a quick catch up with Mark Ames about rugby, hookers and bears (of course).

Hey Mark. We’d like to wish XXL a happy birthday! What did you wish for?

A bigger bolder bear of course … Oh and birthday cake.

What celebrations can we expect?

Fun, fur and frenzied frolicking. Chunky cheekiness and a few big bangs.

It’s the rugby world cup soon! Who’s your fave hot rugby player? 

My man, James.

Would you say you’re a hooker? 

I’ve been called worse, lol.

“Fun, fur and frenzied frolicking. Chunky cheekiness and a few big bangs”

Why do you think there is such a connection between bears and rugby?

I guess you need to look at the body type for a basic connection. It’s changed recently but rugby players on the whole are large and portly, plus bears are rugged and handsome. You don’t often see twinks playing rugby, unless it’s the varsity matches. Plus it’s a bit pre-porn; loads of young gay men of my age with big legs and shirts being ripped off on the TV. When I was a kid seeing furry hunks once made me stop kissing a girl on the couch…inception of the fact I like big Bears I guess!

Who’s your favourite famous bear? (Rupert, Paddington etc.)

I don’t do favourites; it’s all about everyone being important and loved. Treat others as you would yourself, I say. So here, eat some cake mmmm that makes everyone more huggable, even grizzlies. But Rupert with his dashing outfits beats Paddington. I’m not saying anything about dowdy old parkas and hats or those that loaf off others, hehe

What are XXL’s grand plans for the future, at the ripe old age of 15?

Like any teenager we are out to party like never before. Just you try to keep up – we bears like it big and bouncy.

• You can join the celebrations this Saturday 19th September at Pulse (1 Invicta Plaza, Blackfriars Bridge, SE1 9UF). 10pm – 7am. Tickets £15, £8 for members.

This week I’ve been suspended from our favourite social media platform Facebook for having an inauthentic name… LOL!

It was only a matter of time and I probably spend too much time scrolling down threads but I’m one that really enjoys the internet so quite rightly I’m having withdrawal symptoms! This week we’re into London Fashion Week which is another social time of the year I enjoy. This year it’s all taking pace in the Brewer Street Car Park (Brewer Street, W1F 0LA) so if you’re wondering what the hell is going on, now you know Soho will be awash with fashionistas from Friday 18th September!

Having a ball down The Glory’s (281 Kingsland Road, E2 8AS) regular Sunday night Big Queer Songbook with Rudi Douglas & Friends starts at 7pm and it’s free to get in for most enjoyable live renditions of songs that ‘made us gay’.

Book in early for Polyester Magazine 1st birthday party on Saturday 26th also at The Glory. Starts at 12 midday with a series of workshops and discussion panels of which I’m on one.

Oooooh! Electro-clash is a word I haven’t heard for a while. Shake Yer Dix at the Dalston Superstore (117 Kingsland High Street, E8 2PB) on Friday 18th September say it’s all about Peaches this month, and they’ll be celebrating with Ronika DJing downstairs with Joe Parry & Emma Garland (Vice) upstairs.

Another one ahead of the fashion fireball on Friday 25th September is Sassitude Vol. 1V at VFD (66 Stoke Newington Road, N16 7XB) Back with added sass join Emily Rose England and Charles Jeffrey playing music in the legendary Dalston basement from 10pm till late!

While we haven’t got a date for the actual closing of The George & Dragon (2-4 Hackney Road, E2 7NS) they tell me they’re hoping for one last Christmas within its hallowed walls. This weekend Alex & Afonso present Slinky on Friday 18th September and our faves Matthew & Julian Smith (Jacqui Potato) are DJing on Saturday 19th. And every Sunday at Super Sundays superstar designer Charles Jeffrey holds the fort with an array of special guests playing an array of special music and creating happenings!

Meanwhile I hear news of a new space from the team behind our beloved local The Nelsons Head. More on that soon! Well I think that’s the gossip for this week…

Star of Mad Men and 12 Years a Slave, Bryan Batt brings his hotly anticipated cabaret show to London this month. The out and proud gay Hollywood actor will take to the stage of The Bayou Banquet with just a microphone and a piano to regale guests with stories and songs from his hometown of New Orleans. This week Jason Reid talks to Bryan about starring in Mad Men, being gay in Hollywood, and his love for New Orleans.

I’ve got to start by asking you about Mad Men, if not I’ll probably get lynched by the super-fans. How was it to be a part of that?

Mad Men was the very first TV pilot I shot, and the first series I was a regular character in. To be part of such an iconic and great show set the bar very high.

So it was good then? 

It was MAGICAL. When we shot the pilot episode, we had no idea what the show would become and it was a fabulous journey as it all unfolded.

What did you enjoy most about playing Salvatore? He was a very interesting character…

Hell, everything! Foremost the brilliant writing which made portraying Sal an effortless joy. Early on I realised that we, the actors, were going to be so well taken care of on every front: writing, costume, lighting, set, and editing, that we were able to fly with no worries or reservations. We knew the powers that be would never let us or the show be less than the best. It was and remains one of the best sets I’ve ever worked on.

Moving on, you’re an out and proud gay Hollywood actor. However many still choose to remain in the closet. Why do you think it’s still relatively difficult to be out in Hollywood?

One word: money. But I believe that is changing. While there are established TV and Broadway stars like Neil Patrick Harris who are out, for the film industry, it is moving very slowly.

Are the younger actors changing that trend in your experience? 

I think just like their age group, younger audiences don’t really care if someone is gay or straight and that reflect upon actors. Younger actors are more likely to come out as bisexual or gay these days. But in Hollywood and the film industry internationally, it’s all about money. When a big money making box office star comes out and continues to bring in the big bucks, watch out!

Have you ever felt at a disadvantage career-wise by being out? 

Of course. I’ve actually been refused the opportunity to audition for roles because the casting director couldn’t “see” me in the role. The role was a lawyer. And the casting director was gay. Crazy, right?

“I promise laughter, and maybe an emotional tug at the heart here and there. A definite FUN evening!”

Bonkers! Do you think directors’ mindsets will change anytime soon?

With the great strides the gay movement has made so rapidly in recent years, I think it may take some time for the average joe to catch up.

Is there ever a circumstance where you would agree with outing someone? 

The only time I would agree with outing someone would be when that person was an elected official or someone who openly opposed LBGT equality while hypocrictiaclly being a closet case. I have no time for that shit.

You’re a New Orleans boy, born and bred, what are your three favourite things about this great city? 

The people, the culture and the soul.

The new show also centres around your beloved hometown, so what can we expect?

Its my thing, my stories, with an eclectic mix up of songs. I promise laughter, and maybe an emotional tug at the heart here and there. A definite FUN evening!

The Bryan Batt Cabaret presents Tales from New Orleans is running from Monday 21st and Wednesday 23rd September. Tickets £25 Monday & Tuesday, £40 Wednesday (includes 4 course dinner). Doors 8pm.